Monday, February 27, 2006
I hate it when I cry, but I do it all the time...
Ok, so this weekend we had Girl's Night In with a special viewing of "The Notebook" starring James Garner, Gena Rowlands, Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams. The viewing was sparked by a heated debate in the lunchbox about how good this purported "chick flick" is. Two guys chimed in saying how good it was and how they didn't feel less "macho" for saying so. My mom likes it, Laura even OWNS it (which is how the viewing came about, actually) but we were warned that its a "crying movie".
Great. I freaking cry at EVERYTHING. I know, you're all thinking "Marlena you LIAR! You're a heartless robot!!" No, I'm not. I have LOTS of feelings, I just choose not to show them to anyone but Ben on a regular basis. I will, however, apologize to anyone who attended the screening of Tim Burton's Big Fish with me in the theatre. I went to see this movie right after my best friend's dad died and it was too soon to see a movie like that. I was such a wreck coming out of that theatre that people were openly staring at me like I was a mental patient. I have recently bought this movie on DVD and can't bring myself to watch it for fear that I'm going to lose it again.
I cry at movies, stupid commercials, at old ladies I see on the street, animals, songs... you name it. Its not like I'm a running faucet, though. Its more like my eyes get stingy, or my throat gets tight, and I can usually blink back a lot of the day to day tears because they're silly and I don't want people to think there's something wrong with me. I mean I cried at King Kong, The Iron Giant, Winged Migration, Bambi and so many others. We actually had a small debate that Disney secretly hates kids and gives them horrible visions of losing their parents at a tender age because they're cruel.
My tears are also not always tears of sadness, sometimes its out of love or joy. I also cry when I'm fighting with someone or really angry. I guess I just get myself so worked up that its either pass out or let the waterworks fly.
I can't count the number of fights I've had with my sister or mom, or even friends where I'm so mad I could just spit and we're screaming at each other, and I just start crying. I can't help it. Usually that puts an end to the argument because the person I'm arguing with gets thrown off by it, so it has its advantages.
So anyway, back to the Notebook. We all had a lot of booze and were full of yummy cheese fondue when we started the movie, so our emotions were all a little heightened at this point as it was. The movie starts out pretty formulaic as far as love stories go. James Garner is reading a story to Gena Rowlands who's in a nursing home, the love story between Ryan Gosling's character and Rachel McAdams' character. We aren't given James Garner or Gena Rowlands' character's names at this point, just that it seems James Garner reads to her this story A LOT.
So the formula of the younger characters story is this: Guy is poor. Girl is rich. Guy tricks girl into going out with him. Guy and girl fall in love. Girl's parents don't think he's good enough for her. Girl's parents send her away (to college at least). Guy writes to girl. Girl's mom intercepts guy's letters. Girl thinks poor guy doesn't love her because he didn't write to her. Girl meets rich guy. Girl gets engaged to rich guy, but still loves poor guy. Girl meets up with poor guy later on. They rekindle their love. She then gets to decide whether to marry rich guy and do what society says she should or throw caution to the wind and stay with poor guy. Typical love story, I wasn't really impressed with it too much by this time. It was enjoyable but not fall off the couch with a box of kleenex enjoyable. (I think now that my discontent with it was because it got TOO hyped up by everyone. I hate it when that happens because I feel like I've gotten gyped.)
***Ok, BIG spoilers here. If you haven't seen this movie and plan to and don't want it ruined then don't read the rest of this entry. Go rent it and come back to it... ***
Everyone ready? Ok.
So then we flash forward to the older couple (this happens throughout the movie) and James Garner's kids show up to meet Gena Rowlands. She's happy to meet them and then she's whisked away by her orderly. I had pretty much gathered by now that James Garner was Ryan Gosling as an older man and the same that Gena Rowlands was Rachel McAdams as an older woman. And it was then confirmed by the showing up of the kids. They ask James Garner why he doesn't come home because their mother doesn't even recognize them or know who they are. It seems she has an advanced case of Alzheimer's Disease. James Garner tells them that he's not going anywhere, and that his home is with her (Gena). So now we know that he's been reading her their own love story trying to get her to remember who she is.
He sets up a nice candlelit dinner in her room at the end of the day and she finally realizes who she is and that this is their story. She fully remembers him and asks him how long they have. He tells her its usually about 5 minutes when she starts to forget him again. So he puts on a tape recorder and dances with her for a moment while they still have time to be together.
Now this is the part where I just lost it.
While they are dancing they are talking and he calls her "darling" or "sweetheart" something like that, and she pushes away from him and freaks out asking him why he called her that and who is he, what is he doing in her room. Then she starts screaming for help. Then they cut to James Garner who has sat down on her bed and the look on his face, the most horrible look I have EVER seen on a human being's face in my life, is just the saddest thing EVER. I can't even describe it, but its the most hurtful, soulful look I've ever seen. James Garner is now, in my opinion, one of the BEST actors ever. I've always like him, but now he's in my top ten. I don't think someone could have conveyed that kind of emotion if they haven't had some kind of tragedy in their life to work from, because you just can't fake that kind of torment.
So yeah, I'm a total puddle of goo at this point, trying not to let the other ladies realize that I'm about to start swimming in my own mess.
We then see him in his room going through old photos of himself and Gena which is another kleenex moment in its sadness. Then James Garner has a heart attack. Gena Rowlands seems genuinely concerned for him, its like she remembers a little bit but they don't really say. He ends up being fine and while he's recovering he goes to try to sneak into Gena's room. The night nurse says he can't go in, but she ends up leaving so he can visit her anyway.
He lays in bed with her and they hold hands and talk. I can't quite remember what she said, but it was along the lines of asking him if he was ready to go (like DIE) or something. I couldn't really pay attention at this point, and I told everyone in the room that if they both died that I was going to lose it.
So yeah, of course the nurse comes in the next morning and they're both there in the bed, looking peacefully asleep. WRONG! They're DEAD!!! They both died in each other's arms, holding hands.
WHAT THE CRAP!? So I just lost it and the rest of the girls are just bawling their eyes out, cursing this movie back to the depths of hell it came from. Laura told us there's a deleted scene where Gena (or Rachel I didn't ask, the character at least) realizes that she's losing her memory and she starts writing down their story for James to read to her. We see the actual notebook while James is looking through the photos and it shows that she's the one who wrote it and its has an inscription telling James to read this to her so she'll come back to him.
The whole movie was sort of a disappointment up until the last 20 minutes or so...So yeah Tony, you hit it, James Garner and Gena Rowlands stole the show.
I don't think this is a movie I'd like to own, or ever even see again, but I'm glad I saw it and I hope to God that I never get Alzheimer's. I don't know how scary it would be for me to have it, but I can't imagine my family having to endure that heartache. I'm sure not really remembering who you are would be scary, but I would just die if Ben had to go through what James Garner went through in that movie. I think that's what moved me most, because its things like that, situations that I can put myself and my loved ones in, that are the most emotional for me.
So that's what I thought about the Notebook. OK movie, but with a REALLY REALLY good (or bad, depending how you look at it. I HATE emotional porn) ending. So by good, I actually mean that it made me want to jump off the roof because I was so sad.
Thanks to everyone that made the big stink about this movie and forced me watch it.
Great. I freaking cry at EVERYTHING. I know, you're all thinking "Marlena you LIAR! You're a heartless robot!!" No, I'm not. I have LOTS of feelings, I just choose not to show them to anyone but Ben on a regular basis. I will, however, apologize to anyone who attended the screening of Tim Burton's Big Fish with me in the theatre. I went to see this movie right after my best friend's dad died and it was too soon to see a movie like that. I was such a wreck coming out of that theatre that people were openly staring at me like I was a mental patient. I have recently bought this movie on DVD and can't bring myself to watch it for fear that I'm going to lose it again.
I cry at movies, stupid commercials, at old ladies I see on the street, animals, songs... you name it. Its not like I'm a running faucet, though. Its more like my eyes get stingy, or my throat gets tight, and I can usually blink back a lot of the day to day tears because they're silly and I don't want people to think there's something wrong with me. I mean I cried at King Kong, The Iron Giant, Winged Migration, Bambi and so many others. We actually had a small debate that Disney secretly hates kids and gives them horrible visions of losing their parents at a tender age because they're cruel.
My tears are also not always tears of sadness, sometimes its out of love or joy. I also cry when I'm fighting with someone or really angry. I guess I just get myself so worked up that its either pass out or let the waterworks fly.
I can't count the number of fights I've had with my sister or mom, or even friends where I'm so mad I could just spit and we're screaming at each other, and I just start crying. I can't help it. Usually that puts an end to the argument because the person I'm arguing with gets thrown off by it, so it has its advantages.
So anyway, back to the Notebook. We all had a lot of booze and were full of yummy cheese fondue when we started the movie, so our emotions were all a little heightened at this point as it was. The movie starts out pretty formulaic as far as love stories go. James Garner is reading a story to Gena Rowlands who's in a nursing home, the love story between Ryan Gosling's character and Rachel McAdams' character. We aren't given James Garner or Gena Rowlands' character's names at this point, just that it seems James Garner reads to her this story A LOT.
So the formula of the younger characters story is this: Guy is poor. Girl is rich. Guy tricks girl into going out with him. Guy and girl fall in love. Girl's parents don't think he's good enough for her. Girl's parents send her away (to college at least). Guy writes to girl. Girl's mom intercepts guy's letters. Girl thinks poor guy doesn't love her because he didn't write to her. Girl meets rich guy. Girl gets engaged to rich guy, but still loves poor guy. Girl meets up with poor guy later on. They rekindle their love. She then gets to decide whether to marry rich guy and do what society says she should or throw caution to the wind and stay with poor guy. Typical love story, I wasn't really impressed with it too much by this time. It was enjoyable but not fall off the couch with a box of kleenex enjoyable. (I think now that my discontent with it was because it got TOO hyped up by everyone. I hate it when that happens because I feel like I've gotten gyped.)
***Ok, BIG spoilers here. If you haven't seen this movie and plan to and don't want it ruined then don't read the rest of this entry. Go rent it and come back to it... ***
Everyone ready? Ok.
So then we flash forward to the older couple (this happens throughout the movie) and James Garner's kids show up to meet Gena Rowlands. She's happy to meet them and then she's whisked away by her orderly. I had pretty much gathered by now that James Garner was Ryan Gosling as an older man and the same that Gena Rowlands was Rachel McAdams as an older woman. And it was then confirmed by the showing up of the kids. They ask James Garner why he doesn't come home because their mother doesn't even recognize them or know who they are. It seems she has an advanced case of Alzheimer's Disease. James Garner tells them that he's not going anywhere, and that his home is with her (Gena). So now we know that he's been reading her their own love story trying to get her to remember who she is.
He sets up a nice candlelit dinner in her room at the end of the day and she finally realizes who she is and that this is their story. She fully remembers him and asks him how long they have. He tells her its usually about 5 minutes when she starts to forget him again. So he puts on a tape recorder and dances with her for a moment while they still have time to be together.
Now this is the part where I just lost it.
While they are dancing they are talking and he calls her "darling" or "sweetheart" something like that, and she pushes away from him and freaks out asking him why he called her that and who is he, what is he doing in her room. Then she starts screaming for help. Then they cut to James Garner who has sat down on her bed and the look on his face, the most horrible look I have EVER seen on a human being's face in my life, is just the saddest thing EVER. I can't even describe it, but its the most hurtful, soulful look I've ever seen. James Garner is now, in my opinion, one of the BEST actors ever. I've always like him, but now he's in my top ten. I don't think someone could have conveyed that kind of emotion if they haven't had some kind of tragedy in their life to work from, because you just can't fake that kind of torment.
So yeah, I'm a total puddle of goo at this point, trying not to let the other ladies realize that I'm about to start swimming in my own mess.
We then see him in his room going through old photos of himself and Gena which is another kleenex moment in its sadness. Then James Garner has a heart attack. Gena Rowlands seems genuinely concerned for him, its like she remembers a little bit but they don't really say. He ends up being fine and while he's recovering he goes to try to sneak into Gena's room. The night nurse says he can't go in, but she ends up leaving so he can visit her anyway.
He lays in bed with her and they hold hands and talk. I can't quite remember what she said, but it was along the lines of asking him if he was ready to go (like DIE) or something. I couldn't really pay attention at this point, and I told everyone in the room that if they both died that I was going to lose it.
So yeah, of course the nurse comes in the next morning and they're both there in the bed, looking peacefully asleep. WRONG! They're DEAD!!! They both died in each other's arms, holding hands.
WHAT THE CRAP!? So I just lost it and the rest of the girls are just bawling their eyes out, cursing this movie back to the depths of hell it came from. Laura told us there's a deleted scene where Gena (or Rachel I didn't ask, the character at least) realizes that she's losing her memory and she starts writing down their story for James to read to her. We see the actual notebook while James is looking through the photos and it shows that she's the one who wrote it and its has an inscription telling James to read this to her so she'll come back to him.
The whole movie was sort of a disappointment up until the last 20 minutes or so...So yeah Tony, you hit it, James Garner and Gena Rowlands stole the show.
I don't think this is a movie I'd like to own, or ever even see again, but I'm glad I saw it and I hope to God that I never get Alzheimer's. I don't know how scary it would be for me to have it, but I can't imagine my family having to endure that heartache. I'm sure not really remembering who you are would be scary, but I would just die if Ben had to go through what James Garner went through in that movie. I think that's what moved me most, because its things like that, situations that I can put myself and my loved ones in, that are the most emotional for me.
So that's what I thought about the Notebook. OK movie, but with a REALLY REALLY good (or bad, depending how you look at it. I HATE emotional porn) ending. So by good, I actually mean that it made me want to jump off the roof because I was so sad.
Thanks to everyone that made the big stink about this movie and forced me watch it.
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It's too bad the hype led to disappointment. I knew NOTHING about the film before watching it and was surprised at every turn how much I enjoyed it (and I disagree about the Ryan and Rachel sequences, I thought they were wonderful).
Oh well. Last time I ever recommend a movie to YOU.
;)
-Otis
Oh well. Last time I ever recommend a movie to YOU.
;)
-Otis
HA! Its not your fault, I just have REALLY high expectations in movies (some might say that's laughable also but...) and I hold my friend's opinions in high regards so if someone tells me a movie is great, I go in thinking its going to knock my socks off. Its mostly my fault.
I also had The Ring ruined for me in the same vein. I love horror movies with a passion and was disappointed that I didn't pee myself in the theatre on that one because a friend of mine told me it made him have to go home and watch Disney movies after seeing it and his idea of a good time would be to spend an evening with the Manson family and Leatherface. So when it wasn't as scary as he had made it out to be I was put off by it.
I just thought the love story was too formulaic for me (but I love formulaic slasher/horror movies, again I'm a hyporcrite!) but the acting done by Ryan and Rachel was superb. I'm just a sucker for James Garner I guess.
And please continue to recommend movies to me, just don't go on and on about them until AFTER I've seen them. That way I can gush about them with you. Because apparently that's what does me in. :)
I also had The Ring ruined for me in the same vein. I love horror movies with a passion and was disappointed that I didn't pee myself in the theatre on that one because a friend of mine told me it made him have to go home and watch Disney movies after seeing it and his idea of a good time would be to spend an evening with the Manson family and Leatherface. So when it wasn't as scary as he had made it out to be I was put off by it.
I just thought the love story was too formulaic for me (but I love formulaic slasher/horror movies, again I'm a hyporcrite!) but the acting done by Ryan and Rachel was superb. I'm just a sucker for James Garner I guess.
And please continue to recommend movies to me, just don't go on and on about them until AFTER I've seen them. That way I can gush about them with you. Because apparently that's what does me in. :)
Yeah, I know it's a chick-flick but I loved this movie. ;)
I gotta agree. I hadn't heard anything about it before I watched it. I watched it with the GF who wouldn't tell me much about it other than how good it was. Watching it, I kept thinking it was nice, but nothing special. The ending is what totally sold it for me. If it wasn't for the last half hour or so, it would have been another cute but forgettable movie. As it is now, I highly recommend it to all my friends :)
-Freddy
I gotta agree. I hadn't heard anything about it before I watched it. I watched it with the GF who wouldn't tell me much about it other than how good it was. Watching it, I kept thinking it was nice, but nothing special. The ending is what totally sold it for me. If it wasn't for the last half hour or so, it would have been another cute but forgettable movie. As it is now, I highly recommend it to all my friends :)
-Freddy
I'm actually with you Marlena. I hated the movie for making me cry, but what I saw of it was great.
Yes, I DID fall asleep even if I kept denying it. I think I missed most of the middle because I don't really remember her meeting the dude she was engaged to, or who the chick was that Noah was telling to go away. In my mind, she was the town slut, but I'm sure that's not how it went.
Yes, I DID fall asleep even if I kept denying it. I think I missed most of the middle because I don't really remember her meeting the dude she was engaged to, or who the chick was that Noah was telling to go away. In my mind, she was the town slut, but I'm sure that's not how it went.
HA! Ok, that's three men that I know that will admit to having watched this movie. This could be a major milestone in cinema. Glad you liked it, Freddy. It was a pretty good movie, I will say.
So Lori, our shouting of your name at 5,000 decibels at sporadic intervals didn't keep you awake? You ARE a machine!
I don't even remember how she met the rich guy and they didn't really explain who Noah was sleeping with. She was just kinda there, and then not there...at least that's what I remember.
Boys? Care to enlighten us?
So Lori, our shouting of your name at 5,000 decibels at sporadic intervals didn't keep you awake? You ARE a machine!
I don't even remember how she met the rich guy and they didn't really explain who Noah was sleeping with. She was just kinda there, and then not there...at least that's what I remember.
Boys? Care to enlighten us?
Well, count me out of "most men" when it comes to movies. I'll give you two examples:
1. My favorite film from last year was "Pride & Prejudice" (and I thought Episode III was awful).
2. My favorite film from the last 10 years is "The English Patient".
I'm not "most guys".
-Otis
1. My favorite film from last year was "Pride & Prejudice" (and I thought Episode III was awful).
2. My favorite film from the last 10 years is "The English Patient".
I'm not "most guys".
-Otis
Well, I will agree with you that you aren't like "most guys", Otis. That's for sure. :)
I think its your dryness, are you sure you aren't British?
You are still a guy though, so you are still a guy that has seen (and liked) this movie. And there's nothing wrong with that. Its pretty cool actually.
Episode III was definitely flawed, but I still like it better than the Phantom Menace, if only for the absence of Jake Lloyd.
I think its your dryness, are you sure you aren't British?
You are still a guy though, so you are still a guy that has seen (and liked) this movie. And there's nothing wrong with that. Its pretty cool actually.
Episode III was definitely flawed, but I still like it better than the Phantom Menace, if only for the absence of Jake Lloyd.
On the Contrary - you cried for EXACTLY the reason I thought you would. I, too, avoided the movie because I'd heard it was oh so sad and especially with a semi-close relationship to someone with advanced alzheimers.. then I watched it and was like, "WTF? This is cute and all but... I'm not crying." And then JAMES GARNER AND THE MUTUAL DEATH!!! Bahhhhhh!!!
I think its criminal to not have had a disclaimer on that movie stating how jacked up the ending is.
Wasn't James Garner's face the saddest thing you'd ever seen!?!
I also think the makers of Sleepaway Camp needed a similar disclaimer on the end of THAT train wreck of a movie.
Wasn't James Garner's face the saddest thing you'd ever seen!?!
I also think the makers of Sleepaway Camp needed a similar disclaimer on the end of THAT train wreck of a movie.
Okay, not to start a tangent on Sleepaway camp, but I think you've got a master plan here Marlena. Some sort of movie ratings system to prepare you. Much like American Beauty. I LOVED that movie until the end, and now I can't even handle watching it. Or The Last Broadcast. Well, that was just a dumbass ending, but you get the point.
Get on that, when you're done coloring comics and doing my website and working and being a wife and talking me down from ledges every two to three days. You need one more thing to do, right?
Get on that, when you're done coloring comics and doing my website and working and being a wife and talking me down from ledges every two to three days. You need one more thing to do, right?
I'll put that on my "To Do" list right between curing cancer and feeding the homeless.
(and don't you EVER say anything bad about American Beauty, cause I'll cut you!)
(and don't you EVER say anything bad about American Beauty, cause I'll cut you!)
I said I loved it until the end...I think it's a well known fact I love Alan Ball and everything he does. Just not the end to that movie. I'm sure that's what he was going for, but it really bothered me.
Don't forget harvesting furballs. You're REALLY good at that!
Don't forget harvesting furballs. You're REALLY good at that!
I don't care what you say, the end was perfection as well. What bothered you about it?
Oh yeah, harvesting furballs is on the list between killing Chuck Norris and developing the use of Tomatoes as nuclear energy.
Also, my friend Jenn cleared up what Gena Rowlands says at the end of the movie. Its along the lines of "Do you think, if two people want something, they can make it happen?" Which is SO much sadder than what I thought!!! GOD I hate that movie more and more everytime I talk about it.
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Oh yeah, harvesting furballs is on the list between killing Chuck Norris and developing the use of Tomatoes as nuclear energy.
Also, my friend Jenn cleared up what Gena Rowlands says at the end of the movie. Its along the lines of "Do you think, if two people want something, they can make it happen?" Which is SO much sadder than what I thought!!! GOD I hate that movie more and more everytime I talk about it.
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