Friday, March 03, 2006
The Toilet and Secret Saga
I'm going to leave all of you with this lovely entry before I take a brief hiatus to attend Staple in Austin this weekend.
First off, I'd like everyone to go to this website. Post Secret. I'm watching 20/20 right now and they are actually talking about this website. Kudos to Chris for posting this on his blog awhile back and I look at it at least once a week. The 20/20 episode is about secrets, keeping them and betraying them. I started watching it and had to leave the house for the reason for the rest of this entry, and when I got back I caught the last half of the segment about Post Secret. Check it out.
Ah, the toilet seat. A little back story...
When Ben and I bought our house, we lucked into a cute little duplex with two bedrooms and two baths. Its been a really excellent set up since we both work together and have to get up at the same time to get ready for work, it isn't really practical for us to use the same bathroom to get ready. We end up in each other's way and make ourselves run even more late than we already do on a daily basis. The second bathroom solved this dilemma by giving each of us our own space to get ready in each day. We only end up being 10 minutes late to work rather than 20 or 25 if we tried to get ready in the same bathroom. (Our boss really doesn't care when we come in, but we try to get there at 8:30 everyday)
The only problem with our bathrooms were the toilet seats.
A really nice little old lady lived in our house before we bought it and apparently she really liked the "country" look because the toilet seats were made of wood. Wood! On your bare bottom! I felt like we were living in the old colonial days and we should be doing our "business" outside and the door should have a crescent moon cut into it.
We weren't really that concerned with the toilet seats after we moved in because of all the other fun things a new house requires you to purchase, like a lawnmower, new couches and a baker's rack for all the wonderful kitchens appliances we received for our wedding.
About a month ago the toilet seat in Ben's bathroom broke. The hinge that keeps it on the bowl gave out and he was going to go buy a new hinge to put on the seat to fix it. When we got to Lowe's I said, why don't you just get a new toilet seat? They are only $20 and since we both hated the wood seat he decided, yes, that would be a good idea. The toilet seat has made his bathroom look brand new and SO much more inviting...its strange how the smallest thing can make the biggest difference in making a room look like it has entered this century.
So today since we had the day off we decided that it was time to replace my old nasty wood toilet seat with a shiny white one.
A toilet's a toilet right? So we buy the exact same seat we bought for Ben's bathroom. We had a lot of running around to do tonight before going to Austin in the morning, so at about 9:30 when things are settling down for the night Ben goes to replace the toilet seat in "my" bathroom.
"HONEY! Come here!!"
I go running into the bathroom thinking he's just cut himself to ribbons trying to replace the seat only to find him pointing to the offending commode. "Look. LOOK!"
The toilet seat barely covers the top of the bowl.
What the crap? Apparently, I have the "fancy" toilet in my bathroom, since its in the master bedroom and is therefore privy to having a slightly bigger bowl. Holy crap we think, because Ben has already disposed of the wood seat in the trash and I'm SO not about to put my delicate derriere on a toilet seat that's already been in the trash, so getting it back out and putting it back on is NOT an option.
"What time does Lowe's close?"
"I don't know!"
"Get dressed, we gotta go back!"
So we race to the car and speed like demons back to Lowe's to try and get there before they close, praying that they close at 10 and not 9 on Fridays.
We get in and Ben goes to return the small seat and I try to go to the back of the store and get the correct one so we don't have to waste any MORE time dealing with this FUBAR situation. Of course the size of seat I need is on the tippy toppest shelf. Its 9:45, they close at 10, so there's not a Lowe's employee in sight. I'm not that short, but I was going to kill myself if I tried to get this thing by myself. Ben comes back to find me wondering what the hell I'm doing back there and he grabs the right one and we're out.
We get home, he installs the new seat and all is right in the world.
Lesson learned? If you need to buy a new toilet seat, measure it first. Or at least take a look at the toilet before you leave and try to notice which of the TWO different size standard toilets you have. Once you buy a toilet seat don't wait until 9:30 at night to install it, do it right when you get home so you know if there's a problem. Also, don't completely destroy the old toilet seat before making sure that the new one is going to work for you. And lastly, if you do end up doing all of the above things wrong and need to go exchange your seat at 9:30 at night, let your husband go get a new seat since he can probably reach the shelf better than you can, and YOU should take the return seat to customer service to get the store credit.
You'll save yourself a lot of grief and have happy potty time always.
Poopshoot.
First off, I'd like everyone to go to this website. Post Secret. I'm watching 20/20 right now and they are actually talking about this website. Kudos to Chris for posting this on his blog awhile back and I look at it at least once a week. The 20/20 episode is about secrets, keeping them and betraying them. I started watching it and had to leave the house for the reason for the rest of this entry, and when I got back I caught the last half of the segment about Post Secret. Check it out.
Ah, the toilet seat. A little back story...
When Ben and I bought our house, we lucked into a cute little duplex with two bedrooms and two baths. Its been a really excellent set up since we both work together and have to get up at the same time to get ready for work, it isn't really practical for us to use the same bathroom to get ready. We end up in each other's way and make ourselves run even more late than we already do on a daily basis. The second bathroom solved this dilemma by giving each of us our own space to get ready in each day. We only end up being 10 minutes late to work rather than 20 or 25 if we tried to get ready in the same bathroom. (Our boss really doesn't care when we come in, but we try to get there at 8:30 everyday)
The only problem with our bathrooms were the toilet seats.
A really nice little old lady lived in our house before we bought it and apparently she really liked the "country" look because the toilet seats were made of wood. Wood! On your bare bottom! I felt like we were living in the old colonial days and we should be doing our "business" outside and the door should have a crescent moon cut into it.
We weren't really that concerned with the toilet seats after we moved in because of all the other fun things a new house requires you to purchase, like a lawnmower, new couches and a baker's rack for all the wonderful kitchens appliances we received for our wedding.
About a month ago the toilet seat in Ben's bathroom broke. The hinge that keeps it on the bowl gave out and he was going to go buy a new hinge to put on the seat to fix it. When we got to Lowe's I said, why don't you just get a new toilet seat? They are only $20 and since we both hated the wood seat he decided, yes, that would be a good idea. The toilet seat has made his bathroom look brand new and SO much more inviting...its strange how the smallest thing can make the biggest difference in making a room look like it has entered this century.
So today since we had the day off we decided that it was time to replace my old nasty wood toilet seat with a shiny white one.
A toilet's a toilet right? So we buy the exact same seat we bought for Ben's bathroom. We had a lot of running around to do tonight before going to Austin in the morning, so at about 9:30 when things are settling down for the night Ben goes to replace the toilet seat in "my" bathroom.
"HONEY! Come here!!"
I go running into the bathroom thinking he's just cut himself to ribbons trying to replace the seat only to find him pointing to the offending commode. "Look. LOOK!"
The toilet seat barely covers the top of the bowl.
What the crap? Apparently, I have the "fancy" toilet in my bathroom, since its in the master bedroom and is therefore privy to having a slightly bigger bowl. Holy crap we think, because Ben has already disposed of the wood seat in the trash and I'm SO not about to put my delicate derriere on a toilet seat that's already been in the trash, so getting it back out and putting it back on is NOT an option.
"What time does Lowe's close?"
"I don't know!"
"Get dressed, we gotta go back!"
So we race to the car and speed like demons back to Lowe's to try and get there before they close, praying that they close at 10 and not 9 on Fridays.
We get in and Ben goes to return the small seat and I try to go to the back of the store and get the correct one so we don't have to waste any MORE time dealing with this FUBAR situation. Of course the size of seat I need is on the tippy toppest shelf. Its 9:45, they close at 10, so there's not a Lowe's employee in sight. I'm not that short, but I was going to kill myself if I tried to get this thing by myself. Ben comes back to find me wondering what the hell I'm doing back there and he grabs the right one and we're out.
We get home, he installs the new seat and all is right in the world.
Lesson learned? If you need to buy a new toilet seat, measure it first. Or at least take a look at the toilet before you leave and try to notice which of the TWO different size standard toilets you have. Once you buy a toilet seat don't wait until 9:30 at night to install it, do it right when you get home so you know if there's a problem. Also, don't completely destroy the old toilet seat before making sure that the new one is going to work for you. And lastly, if you do end up doing all of the above things wrong and need to go exchange your seat at 9:30 at night, let your husband go get a new seat since he can probably reach the shelf better than you can, and YOU should take the return seat to customer service to get the store credit.
You'll save yourself a lot of grief and have happy potty time always.
Poopshoot.
Comments:
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I think you should start a them e blog for "life advice for young couples." This will include entries like the above and the pillow washing.
Don't forget how to get your cat to kill you in sixty seconds or less.
But yeah, I'm with Erin. She's so smart...
But yeah, I'm with Erin. She's so smart...
I should do that, but I don't think I am in the position to really give advice to anyone.
I could start a "How NOT To" theme blog though...
I'll add that to my list of things to do, right between wrestling alligators and ridding the world of Oprah Winfrey.
I could start a "How NOT To" theme blog though...
I'll add that to my list of things to do, right between wrestling alligators and ridding the world of Oprah Winfrey.
I watched that 20/20 too... Very facinatin' stuff, I'm thinkin' about gettin' the book... Lord knows, I could fill one of those books myself...
Sorry about your Toilet Seat Fiasco... I totally understand the turmoil you went through... I'm not a handy guy, at least not in the traditional way... I'm a creative guy, and after my "Axe-ident", my Grandfather wouldn't let me near anymore of his tools... But, I digress, it takes twice as long to figure out which tool to use, if all the parts came in the box, and then the actual installin' of whatever is at hand... I think you are perfect to do a, "To Do" blog... You know how to mix facts and humor, and are off to great start...
Why don't you and the Alligator temporarily join forces to bring the Big "O" down, then have a Battle of Epic Proportions to decide who will rule Harpo Studios... YEAH!!!
Tony
Sorry about your Toilet Seat Fiasco... I totally understand the turmoil you went through... I'm not a handy guy, at least not in the traditional way... I'm a creative guy, and after my "Axe-ident", my Grandfather wouldn't let me near anymore of his tools... But, I digress, it takes twice as long to figure out which tool to use, if all the parts came in the box, and then the actual installin' of whatever is at hand... I think you are perfect to do a, "To Do" blog... You know how to mix facts and humor, and are off to great start...
Why don't you and the Alligator temporarily join forces to bring the Big "O" down, then have a Battle of Epic Proportions to decide who will rule Harpo Studios... YEAH!!!
Tony
Yeah I want to get that book too.
I wouldn't let you near an axe either though! This "How To" blog seems like a good idea, though I only have one of these episodes every so often, so maybe I will look more into that.
Yes, I think I can persuade a temporary truce with the gator, if only to help the good of humanity. Then we can sell tickets to the ultimate showdown when I kick the crap out of it to rule the world...I mean mainstream media.
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I wouldn't let you near an axe either though! This "How To" blog seems like a good idea, though I only have one of these episodes every so often, so maybe I will look more into that.
Yes, I think I can persuade a temporary truce with the gator, if only to help the good of humanity. Then we can sell tickets to the ultimate showdown when I kick the crap out of it to rule the world...I mean mainstream media.
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